Damn Hypocrite

Writing my second peer review. Because he lost the first one. enjoy


Did the paper touch your heart?


YES *snorts*


In what way/ How?


The writer talked about how his experience on the stage has changed him. This is a personal experience that is dear to his heart because it had made him the confident person that he is today. Constantly being the centre of attention has turned him into an egoistic, pompous bastard who deserves to be left to the bulls… damnit this is not working…

*deep breaths*

Stage fright is something that I can blablablablablablablablablablabla


What main idea is the writer trying to impress?


… personally, I think he’s effing trying to impress his girlfriend or something. I mean, who the hell writes: ‘I am a common student with a remarkable spirit.’?! And the guy can freaking ‘become a perfect human’! WTF?! Is he a genetically modified or mentally challenged? And apparently, he upgraded his confidence level to the pinnacle(peak, Surmount, The highest level)… that explains soooo much…

He freaking thinks people can become extinct for god’s sake. I keep telling the guy, ‘extinct’ is used for groups, populations, generations. Humanity will not die out just because oh high and mighty @!#!#@ kicked the bucket! But no… he insists that if he dies, the entire human population would too. WTF?!


Damndamndamndamndamndamn


WHY THE FUCK DID HE LOSE THE REVIEW PAPER?!?!?!?! I AM SO EFFING BIAS RIGHT NOW!!!


The writer is telling his readers that being frightened while dealing with an audience is perfectly blablablablablablablablablablabla


Does the introduction capture your attention and make you want to read on?


Yes Hell no.


Why?


Why The @#$%$ would I be interested in how he effing got to be so effing overconfident?! I mean, his idea on ‘not abiding the rules’ falls into bringing forbidden items to school, escaping assemblies and breaking into teacher’s room.’ Which is intriguing… did he break into a specific teacher’s room? Hmm…


The introduction gives us a lot on insight into what to expect in the rest of the essay as well as of the writer himself. However, the writer did not give much on the significance of some of the cough *affairs...


Which part of the paper did you like the best? In which paragraph?


*chokes* excuse me? Have you been paying attention to my previous answers? Let me steal a quote from Dorothy Parker, ‘this essay should not be thrown aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.’

But if I were to choose, I’d go for the last paragraph. Can’t wait for it to be over with.

This sentence is… disturbing. ‘I prayed to god to help me to finish my part smoothly like a flow of water in an ocean and like clear water from the tallest waterfall in the world.’

Water in the ocean… ever heard of the Bermuda Triangle? The clear water from the tallest waterfall in the world does not cascade down smoothly. It comes swiftly and mercilessly. The idiot was stupid enough to tell me that he quoted that from a book. He quoted A LOT from the book. If only I was evil enough…

I enjoyed the part where the writer narrated his first blablablablablablablabla


Mark an asterisk (*) at the places where you feel the writer seemed to jump from one idea to another.


*promptly enters asterisks in between every sentence*


Which of the five senses does the writer use in describing his or her personal experience?


None.


The writer focuses blablabla...


Give two suggestions to the writer to improve the paper.


First off, writing is Not your thing. Give up. No use embarrassing yourself. And making my life miserable.

Second, next time you insults my paper, I’m going to send the parts written in Italic to the lecturer.


The paper can be improved by correcting the blablabla...


I'm a damn hypocrite. I know. I'll have fun next time though. :) you can count on it!