From the Borneo Post. :D to Complete and Utter Randomness(Funny Quotes!!)

Just a nice little limericks I read from the English papers. :D So, Before I forget...

There was a man from Peru,
who had a lot of growing up to do,
he'd ring the bell,
then run like hell,
until a man shot him with a .22

Just so you know, I'm completely infatuated with quotes. :D

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

-- Albert Einstein

"The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality."

-- Douglas Porter

"Big Bang Theory: In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded.'"

-- Terry Pratchett

"I'm not suffering from insanity . . . I'm enjoying every minute of it."

-- Unknown

"I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in."

-- Unknown

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

~Attributed to Arthur McBride Bloch

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.

~Willaim Castle

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

You can't have everything... where would you put it?

~Steven Wright

He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed.

~Harry Kalas, on Garry Maddox, 1981

May those who love us love us,
and those who do not love us,
may God turn their hearts,
and if He cannot turn their hearts
may He turn their ankles
that we may know them by their limping.

~Irish Prayer

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile way and you have their shoes.

~Author Unknown

(Keren showed me this before exam. :D luvv you!!)


Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together.

~Carl Zwanzig

(lol. I was thinking... Star wars...)


A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name.

~Evan Esar

(So true!!)

I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.

~Fred Allen

(haha. ungrateful pig)

Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen.

~Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless

Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.

~Douglas Adams, Mostly Harmless